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Friday, December 20, 2013

Do the Hustle or Get Hustled: American Hustle

Hello all... It is me, Lili of Lili-Land! 


I somewhat recall David O. Russell calling my agent Mr Matthew, I call him "Mr. Mathchoo" because he sneezes around me all the time. He tells me it is a canine thing. Some sort of allergy. 

I have no clue what he means, so I just give him Kleenex tissues. Anyway, David wanted me to star in the movie, but my schedule was full so I just did cameo shots for the movie trailer. You know to bring in the audience. 

I never read the fine print or for that matter the script. Mr Matthew warned me against that sort of thing, but me being me told Derek to read the contract and give me the jist of it! He and Meeko read it and said, oh go for it! It is about disco dancing! I found out later the two of them just wanted to meet Christian Bale! 

Christian Bale had Meeko tossed off the set the first day. Seems he isn't a cat person... who is? I'm just kidding. No offense to all my cat loving friends. But Christian Batman just didn't like Meeko cause that dumb cat kept trying to get him to say, "I'm Batman." Christian would have none of that nonsense. 

Anyway... I did some quick filming for the trailer and ran off to a day of shopping at the Mall in New Jersey. They have a lot of great tax free shopping over there. 

So.... a few months go by... and then.... 





I was in the movie mood so I decided to see American Hustle! Meeko told me it was a film about the art of dancing. You know the old dance craze the hustle! 

So, of course Derek and I said we were in! We love to dance! My pads twinkle across the floor like vanilla ice cream melting. I am smooth and cool on my feet.

News flash! American Hustle was not about dancing!

And that little nasty director actually cut me out of my cameo scenes. I guess Bobby D. had to have top billing as a cameo. Ugh... MEN.

I turned to Meeko (he's a cat) wide eyed! "You crazy cat," I whispered. "This is not about dancing!"

Meeko being the cat he is, hissed at me. 




They are just trying to make some money. "Not everyone lives in Lili-Land," he snarled.What a snippy little thing he is.
 
Well I was appalled, but Derek calmed me down with a big bucket of popcorn with extra butter and goobers mixed in. He even gave me a new pink glove to wear so my paws would not get greasy.

So I settled in to watch the movie.




To put it lightly... They were all crooks with crazy clothes, bad accents and terrible hair. But although there was a dance scene in it, the movie was not about the art of dancing. It was about the art of conning! The actors in the film were all great. The soundtrack had Derek and I dancing in our seats.


In truth, I thought David was trying to reach for the Martin Scorsese Award. David clearly studied Goodfellows. Memo to David. Be yourself. 

It's a fine film that in the end could have used a little cutting. Say about 10 minutes.

Don't forget to read the Green Monkey at www.gocomics.com.

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